By LORELEI RHINES

They're here and now there is no way to escape. Nothing can be done to turn back the hands of time. No amount of bribing and prompting of teachers can stop it. They have come, and they're here to stay.

Failure notices are being distributed, but somehow it just doesn't seem fair. Why can't everyone get one? Those few people aren't so special that they should get one and not everyone. Let's give those notices a fair shake. Hmm . . . That would be a special occasion to actually hear someone say that!

The administration should be congratulated at the fine array of colors for failure notices. A white one for mommy and a pink one for me. The counselor gets a yellow one to stuff in his files. But why keep a copy of failures? Wouldn't it be nice to have only a record of achievements?

Everyone gets involved with these "wonderful" and colorful slips. Why even the pet dog can bite the mailman as he cautiously creeps to your mail slot.

Somewhere back behind the hands of time, you recall the teacher warn of these monstrous notices. Just what had he said? Perhaps he only glared at you behind black rimmed glasses and pointed to your grades. Or maybe he teased you in hopes of laughing you out of your disgrace. However, he warned you so now there is really no reason to complain.

Now there seems to be only one remaining problem. What can you tell your folks? "Well I tried; didn't I?" or "I can't stand my teacher!" "Don't worry, I'm not gonna flunk." Whatever the excuse, most parents are up against the hope of having their kid graduate. They really don't want a dummy.

So if you do get one of those colorful failure notices, just remember: there is no way to escape them, only hope of not getting one next time.