. . .when you receive a dozen calendars in the mail and on Jan. 1, you can't find a single one.

. . .when you can't walk into the living room because of all the toys and the kids say, "Is that all?"

. . .A week of inspiration and morality that are filled with crime and violence the other 51.

. . .having to tear open a gift you wrapped so beautifully because you just remembered the price tag was still on it .

. . .when you discovered some idiot put a trunk on the tree decorations that were stored so carefully last year.

. . .matching the price of the gift you're giving this year to the gift you got last year.

. . .when kids who don't believe in Santa any more ask what he's going to bring them.

. . .when you're surprised with a bunch of cards from the very same people you finally decided to cut from your Christmas card list this year.

. . .trying to explain to a bright 4-year-old how it's possible to pass six Santas in one block.

. . .frantic last minute shopping when a gift arrives from a relative you forgot.

. . .the end of two weeks of courteous smiles from tip-hungry people who are crabs the rest of the year.