VOL. XIX, NO. 6
JANUARY 13, 1978
Final Nightmares Return Once Again
BY KEVIN BUSCH
Wake up! Rise and shine. Brush your teeth. You grab your Mickey Mouse Clock and thrust it at the floor. Mickey's little face looks just like your 1,000-piece jigsaw puzzle of a covered bridge in New England. Now that there's peace and quiet, you roll over and start to fall back to sleep, when you catch a glimpse of your girl scout calendar. You sit up and hold your eyelids open. You'd better believe your eyes. Yes, it's the twenty-fifth of January! Go ahead, ask your mom.
You look in the mirror and start to scream. But not because of your face, but because of the note that's taped to the mirror that reads: STUDY FOR YOUR MATH FINAL. You sit down on the toilet and bow your head. Then you gasp as you see that on the toilet paper is written: STUDY FOR YOUR MATH FINAL. . . STUDY FOR YOUR. . you flush the roll of paper down the toilet.
You finish dressing and hurry downstairs. All the while you're eating breakfast, you keep thinking, "Maybe I can get Ma to let me stay home. I've got it," you say to yourself, "I'll be the old smoothie." Quickly you jump up, grab your mother, and carry her into the living room. With a big grin you say, "Ma, I'll do the dishes." Well, everything's going great until you start to think about finals; and in a fit of anger you smash a plate. "Oh my. . ." screams your mother as she zooms in from the living room.
Wake up! Rise and shine. Brush your teeth. You grab your Mickey Mouse Clock and thrust it at the floor. Mickey's little face looks just like your 1,000-piece jigsaw puzzle of a covered bridge in New England. Now that there's peace and quiet, you roll over and start to fall back to sleep, when you catch a glimpse of your girl scout calendar. You sit up and hold your eyelids open. You'd better believe your eyes. Yes, it's the twenty-fifth of January! Go ahead, ask your mom.
You look in the mirror and start to scream. But not because of your face, but because of the note that's taped to the mirror that reads: STUDY FOR YOUR MATH FINAL. You sit down on the toilet and bow your head. Then you gasp as you see that on the toilet paper is written: STUDY FOR YOUR MATH FINAL. . . STUDY FOR YOUR. . you flush the roll of paper down the toilet.
You finish dressing and hurry downstairs. All the while you're eating breakfast, you keep thinking, "Maybe I can get Ma to let me stay home. I've got it," you say to yourself, "I'll be the old smoothie." Quickly you jump up, grab your mother, and carry her into the living room. With a big grin you say, "Ma, I'll do the dishes." Well, everything's going great until you start to think about finals; and in a fit of anger you smash a plate. "Oh my. . ." screams your mother as she zooms in from the living room.
You start to go out the door, and you stop dead in your tracks. "Why didn't I think of this before," you say. I'll pretend like I hurt myself." So you start on your way again, but this time you fall and start screaming as though you spilled acid in your eyes. Your mother comes running. "Oh!" she gasps and then says, "What are you screaming about? You did not tear your pants so I'm not mad. Now be on your way, and good luck on your math final."
Now things look very gloomy as you sit down and wait for the final.
"What am I going to do?" you think to yourself. Suddenly you start laughing hysterically and jump on the teacher's desk. Then you grab the string hanging from the movie screen and swing on it, only to have the screen come down. You rip your pants. You can hear your mother's voice, "Get up! Getup!" You open your eyes, rub them, and are ecstatic to find yourself lying in bed with your math book in your lap. You start laughing and screaming, "It was only a dream! A dream!"
Now things look very gloomy as you sit down and wait for the final.
"What am I going to do?" you think to yourself. Suddenly you start laughing hysterically and jump on the teacher's desk. Then you grab the string hanging from the movie screen and swing on it, only to have the screen come down. You rip your pants. You can hear your mother's voice, "Get up! Getup!" You open your eyes, rub them, and are ecstatic to find yourself lying in bed with your math book in your lap. You start laughing and screaming, "It was only a dream! A dream!"