BY DANA SCHULTZ

Winter. A skier's paradise. A warm weather lover's nightmare. Personally, I hate winter and all of the snow that comes with it. I especially hate all the people who scrape and save their money all year long and then take a trip to Florida, Hawaii, or some other warm winter tourist spot. I secretly pray for O'Hare to close down and see all those people who rave about coming back to Illinois with a golden brown, tropical tan spend their vacation trying to scavenge a seat on another plane as soon as the airport opens again.

One of the bad points of winter is all the shoveling. I'm sure everyone's biggest pet peeve is spending at least three strenuous hours shoveling the six feet of snow at the end of their driveways just to see the snow plow drive down the street and dump an additional six feet of snow back on their driveways. After a while, I watch all my neighbors stop the hopeless attempt at clearing their driveways and spend their time yelling obscene names at the men who drive these plows as they ride down the street.

Another one of my least favorite things is when it's ‑5 degrees and the heat in your house breaks down. Then you've got to spend the next three or four days huddling with your family, wrapped in at least 50 blankets, in front of your fireplace. Or, if you don't have a fireplace, you run to the nearest oven and turn it on full blast at an attempt to warm yourself from the small amount of heat an oven can supply.

The majority of the people in the cold weather states sensibly stay in their warm homes with a crackling fire. But there are always the few people who look out their windows at the many feet of snow and all they can see is some wild, winter adventures facing them.

The are the ones you see cross‑country skiing in their backyards or snowmobiling down busy streets. They drive by while you're struggling with a shovel full of snow, trying to decide where to put it and ask why you're in such a bad mood and why you hate snow. When this happens to me, I suddenly come up with the ideal spot to put my shovel full of snow ‑ right on top of this person's head. That'll teach them to keep away from me while I shovel.

One good aspect of winter is that it brings people together. As I glance out of the window, I can witness people who haven't talked to each other in weeks get together and help each other fight the humongous snow drifts across their yards, sidewalks, driveways, or covering their driveways. All the little kids get together and build igloos, snowmen, forts, toboggan hills or even have a nice, friendly snow ball fight! Winter is also a good excuse for lovers to cuddle up to one another for warmth.

Another good point of winter is that the schools close about once a week because teachers' and students' cars are buried in the snow, and they all call the attendance office to explain their great ordeal. If school's not closed, the only ones who show up are the kids who live within a three‑mile radius from school. Even for them it takes an hour to get to Maine West when it usually only takes five to 10 minutes.

Thank God there are only 29 more days until spring break. I know I'm one of the many people who will celebrate this great day of bliss by taking my bathing suit out of storage and watching the massive flood of water flow through the streets as the last of the snow melts away.