Hi, I'm Morfit. I'm a dog. But I am not an ordinary dog because I can roam the halls or stroll through the cafeteria, auditorium, or library. I'm a privileged dog 'cause I'm the mascot for the Westerner (that's the school paper if you didn't know.)

Help! (I say!) The school is invaded! Invaded with frosh!! Everywhere I go I see 'em, hear 'em, or one of them steps on my tail in those darn crowded halls. These new freshmen are really running around in circles! John Abbott, Jim Alfini, and Ed Schultz are the circle‑runners cause they're trying their luck at cross country. When I trot across the football field, I get trompled on by Jim Cichowski, Charlie Curren, and Bob Kunkle (more *?*$** frosh!).

Hear 'em? Man, you said it! As I neared A‑wing gym, my ears were pierced with yelling and screams. I looked in (of course, I had my paws over my ears), and saw Sharon Cober, Linda Drews (the loudest), Ginger Knudson, Sandy Kunkel, Cindy Schorr, and Linda Wright practicing cheerleading.

The day of a freshman wouldn't be complete unless he dropped his books at least once. As I was coming home from school, I stopped at the Dairy Queen to eat my daily dog biscuit (dipped in chocolate, of course!). Then suddenly - Smash! There were a pile of books before my nose! Linda Gaulker picked them up because they were hers, took two steps and dropped them again! (butterfingers!)

There is even a frosh in this school who thinks he's some kind of a president, Andrew "Stoney" Jackson!

Everybody has their "ups and downs" but you freshmen seem to have more "downs." But what would the school be without you darling little imps? So, I hope you frosh will like Maine West as much as I do!! Till next issue ... Bow Wow,

Morfit