1. One requirement for becoming President of the U.S. is:
A. Coming from a large family
B. Having a lot of money to pay off the voters
C. Having a beautiful wife and adorable children
D. Owning a rocking chair or playing golf

2. The problem of farm surplus can be solved by:
A. Giving the food to the school lunch rooms
B. Killing all the farmers
C. Spraying the crops with strychnine
D. Crossing an elephant with a grasshopper to eat more crops

Section II Science

Please examine this table carefully ‑and base your answers upon the information contained therein.
An experiment to determine the amount of punishment a student can stand:

Student no. 1 homework
Amount ‑ 6 hours
Student went out of his mind.

Student no. 2 school lunch
Amount ‑ 1 average
Student died of unknown cause.

Student no. 3 vacation from school
Amount ‑ 1 week
Student left too fast to be observed.

Section III Math

If six students drank 9.86 liters of coffee over a 7,809 minute period, how many chickens would lay eggs?
A. A geodesical amount;
B. 8,593;
C. Students ate chickens;
D. Not given.

Section IV Language Usage

A molybdenum is:
A. A Fink;
B. A Chickadee;
C. A member of the Save Rose Bimler club;
D. Mike Schleicher's middle name

Well now, stand up on your desks and stretch, and as you leave, please sign the petition for bigger mirrors in the janitor's storeroom.

Morfit and the Finks