(curtain rises)

"Good evening, ladies and gentlemen. Here is Mr. 'This is Your Life' Alf Redwards!"

"Thank you. And now for the announcement of our guest who will be reminded of some of his dear memories by his dear close friends and family. This week's subject is Rick Geertz!"

"Hoo‑Rah!

"We've had Rick shipped here from Des Plaines without his suspecting what was happening. Bring in the crate. Go ahead and open it men, gently. Ah, good. How do you feel, Rick Geertz?"

"Hungry. I haven't eaten in two days."

"What would you like?"

"A bowl of coffee ice cream with chocolate‑marshmallow topping."

"Is this a rib?"

"No, but I would like to know what this is all about."

"You're on TV, Rick. The program, "This is Your Life."

"Well, we'll get to the first voice of the past. See if you can guess its owner."

"I was there when you got all those awards. You know, the Best History student award, the Harvard Book club award, and the National Honor Society award. Also, you were a National Merit finalist and got a scholarship from Grinnell college."

"I bet that's my old counselor, Mr. Sophman!" no. It's your mother. Well, try this one."

"If it weren't for me, you wouldn't have been in all those extra‑curricular activities as A Capella choir, Choraliers, editor of the yearbook, V‑show, the Historical society, Quill and Scroll, and Concert orchestra. You wouldn't have been in the class play either! (cough, cough.)"

"That's my father!"

"Wrong again. It's your old counselor, Mr. Sophman. Here's one you ought to get."

"You despised us!"

"Freshman girls!"

"Why, yes. Good going, Mr. Geertz. Funny you should remember them. Yes, Rick, these have been the people you knew in high school. The people you have loved and, er, despised. In high school you took three accelerated courses and ranked seventh in your class. Will you give us a closing statement?"

"It's good to be leaving."

(curtain lowers)