VOL. V, NO. 5
NOVEMBER 15, 1963
Some people collect bottle caps, green stamps, or match covers, but not Bruce Jacobsen. He collects labels from shirts, sweaters, or anything else available. He likes to read labels, and Jackie Hein likes to read The Scoutmaster's Handbook - still a tenderfoot, Jackie?
Parlez‑vous francais? Rusty Lino and Delores Webster?
Steve "Peaches" Emerson wishes the sixth period boys' gym class' great white leader, Dale Funk, would throw towels at him with a little less vig‑ah.
I used to think I was hearing things like "Ebbtide" played on striparoos, but it was Jeanie Alajoki and Sally Peters all along.
Linda Greenaway shouldn't have changed her lunch period everyone misses her! Dennis Doyle, if you leave your gym suit under your desk in English one more time, we're going to turn you over to the Be Kind to Dumb Animals Society. Les Belzer wishes someone would tell him what an intra‑club council representative is, on account he is one and wants to know, "just for the record."
I bet you wish you were taking regular gym instead of being a senior leader, right Ruth Ann Sommer? Especially with kids like Marlies Lueck Kathy Wyman, Nancy Tracy, and Sue Reeser to contend with!
Scene: Mr. Stenoien's chem class. Wayne Nero, that defender of rights and property, saved the day last week by tearing a fireblanket can off the wall and rushing over to a tremendous chemical blaze. Fine work, Wayne!
NEUROTICAL QUIZ
In view of the innumerable quizzes that appear in all sorts of magazines, books, and candy wrappers, The Westerner takes pride in presenting its own quiz. This is a quiz to end all quizzes! It measures your inclination towards the taking of tests‑in other words a test on tests!
1. Do you take application forms from the walls of buses?
2. Do you enjoy TV quiz shows (even if they are rigged)?
3. Do you watch Perry Mason?
4. Do you prefer yes and no quizzes to essay‑type exams?
5. Do you know why you're taking this stupid quiz?
6. Are you in favor of the House Committee on Un‑American Activities?
Score yourself 1 point for every yes answer. 7-8 points-you cheated, go back and take the test over. 4-6 points-Lay off all sorts of quizzes for nine months. 2-3 points-take quizzes with only a pencil from now on, you may need to erase. 1 point-you need a doctor more than you need a quiz.
Parlez‑vous francais? Rusty Lino and Delores Webster?
Steve "Peaches" Emerson wishes the sixth period boys' gym class' great white leader, Dale Funk, would throw towels at him with a little less vig‑ah.
I used to think I was hearing things like "Ebbtide" played on striparoos, but it was Jeanie Alajoki and Sally Peters all along.
Linda Greenaway shouldn't have changed her lunch period everyone misses her! Dennis Doyle, if you leave your gym suit under your desk in English one more time, we're going to turn you over to the Be Kind to Dumb Animals Society. Les Belzer wishes someone would tell him what an intra‑club council representative is, on account he is one and wants to know, "just for the record."
I bet you wish you were taking regular gym instead of being a senior leader, right Ruth Ann Sommer? Especially with kids like Marlies Lueck Kathy Wyman, Nancy Tracy, and Sue Reeser to contend with!
Scene: Mr. Stenoien's chem class. Wayne Nero, that defender of rights and property, saved the day last week by tearing a fireblanket can off the wall and rushing over to a tremendous chemical blaze. Fine work, Wayne!
NEUROTICAL QUIZ
In view of the innumerable quizzes that appear in all sorts of magazines, books, and candy wrappers, The Westerner takes pride in presenting its own quiz. This is a quiz to end all quizzes! It measures your inclination towards the taking of tests‑in other words a test on tests!
1. Do you take application forms from the walls of buses?
2. Do you enjoy TV quiz shows (even if they are rigged)?
3. Do you watch Perry Mason?
4. Do you prefer yes and no quizzes to essay‑type exams?
5. Do you know why you're taking this stupid quiz?
6. Are you in favor of the House Committee on Un‑American Activities?
Score yourself 1 point for every yes answer. 7-8 points-you cheated, go back and take the test over. 4-6 points-Lay off all sorts of quizzes for nine months. 2-3 points-take quizzes with only a pencil from now on, you may need to erase. 1 point-you need a doctor more than you need a quiz.
