It seems like just a week ago when my Phynques and I were keeping a watchful eye on the freshmen. Well, the freshmen have grown to be sophomores; and the seniors (sniff! sniff!) have grown to be freshmen. I think I'll look into my crystal ball and see how the Class of '71 will fare.

The ball is clearing now, and 1 seem to see a picket line and John Balma playing a part in it. Hey, wait a minute; there is Donna Ladendorf back at her job as chairman leading an enthusiastic service group. What a switch!

I see a new picture now. Yes, there seems to be a theater; but I can't quite make out the name. Wait, it's becoming clearer now. It's the Grand Old Opery, and Cheryl Bard and Cherie Swanson have leading roles. Lorraine Jensen will be there as understudy. Of course, they'll be singing America's favorite song ‑ Holm, Holm, on the Grange. Arlette Dawson is also carrying on her Maine West tradition. My Phynques tell me they hear her on their crystal sets directing a new production of "The Creation of the World."

Jerry Reid seems to have quite a business going for him modeling for wooden Indians for the front of cigar stores. My Phynques prophesy that 87 per cent of all bakery truck accidents will involve bakery trucks. I bet this will cost Dick Schellin a lot of dough!

Oh no, oh no, my picture is fading. But wait it's coming back now‑but where are we? I see Jan Bollet, Sheila Quinn, Jan Grubert, Jill Schlanbusch, Linda Pinzke, Char Freeman, and Katie Levan all back together once again. But they're using their pom‑pons for a different purpose.

Would you believe that there will be international playboys from Maine West? My ball shows Ken Lorentz with his dashing mustache and brocade smoking jacket, with females flocking to his side. Of course, there is Russ Lino with his hotel room, Eddie Lusk and his Southern charm, and John Kalb and Tom Pyron's natural appeal. But they can't keep up with Sukru Gurel who associates with beautiful maidens from Maine West, Maine South, Brazil, Argentina, Ecuador, Greece, England, Turkey, etc. To be sure, one of the flocking females will be Pat Zawodnk who has filled out in some places and now looks smashingly irresistible in her itsy bitsy teenie weenie yellow polka dot bikini!?

What's all the confusion? Oh, it's only Jackie Flieman; she's a telephone operator. Of course, there's Al Fritz. But we don't prophesy for Irishmen! Bill Nagel seems to be developing over the years. Now he's acting the part of a hairy ape without costume. My ball also prophesies that by the end of the year Norm Hudson will be a bay, and by the spring of 1968 Janet’s Fields will be plowed under.

The underworld will quake at the name of Maine West with Phil Heller, Ray Kuntz, and Gary Grooman working for the FBI. Of course, not even these mighty crusaders will be able to stop the crafty John Sukach and his mob, or Terri Sassman and her illegal items. The coming years will bring a change to Maine's Willy the Warrior, Pete Dellagrazio from that to Captain Nice.

The men of Maine West have really matured. While Douglas Bergman is out fighting the Viet Cong in his ice box, Mike Kraft has joined the Foreign Legion. Steve Lovering is at home with his security ‑ his teddy bear. Ed Sullivan has finally retired as master of ceremonies of his show, and his place has been taken by none other than Maine's own David Freer. It seems that George Bongratz has formed his own literary society. During the day he meets with members of his group: Joe Elliot, Larry Coffman, Lynnea Anderson, and Pat Winecke to discuss Winnie the Pooh. George Bethurem is also doing well painting figures on cereal boxes. John Bishop is a teacher; of all things‑now he has his own class.

Wait, wait my picture's fading again. Everything seems to be in order, but there are no lights. Hmmm! Let me look at the newspaper headlines. Yep, that's what I thought. Cam Murdoch is working for Commonwealth Edison, and now the whole city is blacked out. While we are on the subject of light, Ernie Fulbright only has a few years left till he burns out. Say this paper is interesting. What else is happening? Well, now, it seems Larry Scully has made a new advancement in the world of science. Using a system of logic, he has discovered that a fire‑fly that goes through a fan is probably delighted. The paper goes on to say that Marcy Richey, in the field of biology, has reclassified rabbits with fleas under bugs bunnies.

I think my ball is finally giving way; but I see Sue Ziehn, Sharon Higgins, and Anita Waskowski are doing pretty well on the domestic side. Yep, they're making popcorn. Anita's holding the pan, and Sharon and Sue are shaking the stove.

The Crystal ball has finally given out, although I'm sure there are many more things to tell; but for now let old acquaintance be forgot. Wishing you all a happy new year.

Morfit and the Phynques