Happy New Year Warriors

From what I've seen and heard, the holidays were quite exciting, it seems! I sure do hope that Santa brought you everything you asked for. I noticed Pete Whitson is wearing a pair of saddle shoes. Are those new, Pete?

I understand that Wes Van Osdol only received sticks and coals for Christmas because he doesn't believe in Santa Claus.

Next time, Wes, don't believe everything the Easter Bunny tells you. Or, did you say it was the Great Pumpkin? Well, don't take it too hard, I see that's all Tim Finn received too!

I hear that Jerry Frana's car was sick! Nothing serious, I hope; but from what I hear, parts of it were scattered all over his garage. After Brian Ispen helped (?), though, everything was all right.

Hey, Chris Doell, how's your basement? I sure do hope you finished remodeling it by now!

Oh, Diane Kaminski, would you mind explaining to me how you ever inherited the name Parsley Head? I'm dying of curiosity!

From what I understand, Marilyn Phillips made quite a show of her "expert bowling and talent." Want a little advice, Marilyn; ask Wayne Bachar to show you how it's done.

Jeff Spachman, I like that white cream you use to hold up your goggles. Well, if it's anything like shaving cream, would you mind lending some to Barry Burgess. I hear he shaves with a knife now, and it may help ease the pain.

All those seniors who cut December 22 missed the great story in the Westerner about Charlotte Freeman. To make things doubly bad, you missed Morfit!

I understand that we have two authorities on Swedish pronounciation, Louis Volberding and Bruce Blum. They seem to be especially experts in the word Angstrom; with a long A, boys! Oh, Sue Hewes, what's this about you making announcements on the floor?

I hear Nancy Gunn spends her free time hanging from T‑bars. Oh, Myrna Oppenlander and Carol Sterkowitz, let's stop throwing girls into the shower room. Someone may get hurt and kill all their capillaries.

Well, friendly masters and misses, I must now sign off and gather up my news from the Phynques for the next issue. So be on your guard; you may become one of the helpless victims of Morfit!!

Morfit