Say man! Greetings and salutations from the light of the world, that super dog‑the great, illustrious Morfit. My policy is to see all and tell all.

Mmmm . . . I've heard that Ron "Don Juan" Hartley is really getting around lately. Lorie Nave had better watch him! I wish Randee Jackson would tell everyone who M. B. is I'll never tell. Hey, Pat Clement, do you really think your "super" Falcon can beat Joe Richardson's Chevy II ?

It seems Marty Bushey and Jackie Meyer are competing to see who can wear the shortest skirt, but I don't think anyone can compete with Lorrie Ware's magic shoes.

Oh, yes . . . John Sukach, you'd better drive a little slower with all those hot radios you're carrying. As I was tippy‑toeing by Mr. Harold Todd's sixth period class, Craig Madoch was showing everyone his beautiful legs! My, they are a wonder, Craig. Miss Ruth Nickelson, have you gotten any candy lately from that nice fourth period class?

Buzz Didier and Ron "Lover" Sass are constantly floating around the library first period. What's new in foreign aid, Ron? John Mattson and Ted Faught are constantly laughing in there. Maybe Val Dietz can tell us what's so funny . . . could it be her Corvair? And could we have an explanation, Mr. Daniel Holbrook, of how to scrunkle?

Barb Leonard seems to get her kicks from sending "thoughtful" little notes. Why can't boys ever learn?

Special notice to all girls . . . if you want to know where to find some good builds, watch the Maine West swimming teams in action. Rrruff!

I was told by one of the phynques that Miss June Thompson was so interested in talking about leadership that she missed the exit on the tollway to Des Plaines, and everyone took the scenic route to Deerfield.

The worst thing that could happen to a girl these days is to get pushed into the swimming pool without her swimming cap, right, Sue Mandel? Joyce Buthman, why don't you want your name in Morfit? Are you keeping on your toes? Morfit knows!

Morfit and The Phynques